little love letters

dear spring, 

i see you. you're making your way, slowly but surely. keep it coming.

dear emma,

i miss you friend! thank you for taking care of my heart from far away! if you hadn't have already had my love + friendship, you totally would've bought it with this sweet package.

dear sisters, 

thank you for YOU! can't imagine a life without you + thanking my lucky stars every single night for the gift of our friendship.

dear preschool, 

you can't have abel. choose another child.

dear march, 

HOW did you get here so quickly?! wasn't christmas yesterday?

dear isla, 

i could squeeze you too tight, you're my favorite baby in the whole wide world. i love you forever.

dear reader, 

i hope you are having a truly splendid day. i hope it's sunny + warm where you are, and if it's not, i hope you have a cozy fire + a cup of coffee near by.

dear God, 

thank you for my life. thank you for every breath i breathe, for the husband you have so graciously given me. thank you for our sweet kids... ours for keeps?! for real?! thank you forever, for everything, always, amen.

dear anthropologie, 

why don't you believe in legit sales + why are ALL of your home goods on my wish list?

dear travel, 

i hear you calling. husband trips, family trips, girls trips. i hear you.

dear preschool, 

i mean it. you can't have abel. choose another child.

dear lucy, 

tell me you're ready for ballet one more time + i just might HAVE to sign you up. you're the most precious girl, with a most precious name. i love you.

dear clementine,

thank you for this gorgeous artwork. i love it with every last bit of me! you are so talented + i love your name + i love your sister even more(and that's saying something because i really love your name!) thank you thank you thank you!

a back dated love letter to a little one, and a 22 week bump

written february 8, 2016 + saved for publishing (pictured, 22 weeks)

little baby one in my tum,

i love you. i can't believe you are in there... mostly because you don't make yourself known with a whole lot of kicking yet, like i remember it to be. I know you'll make up for it as you grow though.

i wonder so much what you look like, and if you'll be a boy or a girl, and will you be like lucy or abel? or will you be completely new and different?

i hope life out here doesn't sound too chaotic, and i hope you're learning the voices of the people who love you the very most. me + daddy, lucy + abel, and all of our family too!

one thing that i do know, is how special you are. i know this because i've already had two very special kiddos, and i know that God has your wonderful life laid out oh so beautifully, just like theirs.

abel thinks you are a girl. he has decided that if you are in fact a girl, we will name you arrow (that's your cousin, and not what we will name you) and if you're a boy? st. bernard... also not what we will name you, (you're welcome)... but he's sweet for trying. you will LOVE your siblings. they already love you. lucy goes to sleep every night with her face up against my belly, and when she finishes her bottle, she turns to kiss you + drifts to sleep.

i can't wait to meet you little one.

i love lucy

lucy is a firecracker. a whooooole lotta special in a little tiny package. 

at 15 months, she is the sweetest, most snuggliest little angel on the planet. complete with raspy voice, vocabulary way extended for her age, and mohawk/mullet hairstyle that just won't quit. i haven't found a quality in her that i don't like. she would have you read to her, all day... the same few books on repeat... i'm beginning to think it's all about the page turning. my early riser, up with the sun + always smiling. she's willful, and rambunctious, and WAY to interested in things that aren't for her... like EVERYTHING abel does. one going on three...she climbs and rolls and runs and screams and still sadly, leads with the head. for being so coordinated, the girl just can't catch a break when it comes to physical accidents... usually to the face, oy. my favorite thing she is saying right now is "hi... do?" and when i answer with what i'm doing she says "oh." she loves toys like blocks + things that work her brain, and will play on her own and be perfectly content with them. she loves her daddy so much; always has, but these days it's unbearably heart warming. just over one year is such a fun + challenging age, i remember when abel was this age thinking to myself that it's when parenting actually began (whoa) + also that he was the coolest ever... i'm feeling all those same feels round two, except maybe a little more seasoned as a parent + not so "what the heck is going on here?!" still a little "what the heck is going on here?!" though, don't be fooled.

raising children is full of so many lessons, and boy do we need Jesus to do it. my biggest prayer each night is that i do right by them, and by God. that chris and i can discipline strongly + love gently at the same time. that we don't ever crush their spirits, that we (I) can always CTFD before responding to melt downs + bad behavior, so that i can respond with love, and always show them what an in control person looks like (heaven help me)(embarrassed monkey emoji). i pray that we teach them how much jesus loves them, and how special they are, AS they are, and that the Lord continue to equip us and hold us tight as we journey through. 

lucy girl, i love you so much. i've loved you since the minute i knew of you, even more when i found out you were my gift of a daughter, more so when you were born, and my cup runneth over and over every day since. your beauty stops me dead in my tracks on any given day, and your light is always shining bright like the morning sun. i'm thankful for your crooked grin, your little hands around my neck or in my palm, the way you love frosty, your brother and your daddy + i, and the joy you carry with you wherever you go. thank you for blessing us, i love you sweet girl.

lucy, 8 + 9 months.

sweet lucy, 

there is no one like you. you are special in every way, and i love every little bit of you. you're standing up on your own now... have been since april 24th. what. are. you thinking.?! it's adorable and each time you stand for longer + have even tried taking a few steps... you walking is going to be the cutest thing + abel is going to be over the moon! i'm so thankful to have a daughter, to have YOU as my daughter. i dreamed of you long before daddy + i had babies on our radar, and now that i know you, my dreams couldn't have come close to the precious + perfect beauty that you are. i love your hands, and your chubby little feet. those big blue eyes melt me every time you look my way + your grin is infectious. you love your brother + you love your daddy... i like to think i'm your favorite since you're planted on my hip 99% of the time + don't want to go to anyone else, and let me tell you sister... it warms my heart like nothing else. i wish you'd stop growing up so fast. i know that in a blink you'll be walking + before i can catch my breath we will be watching your first dance recital and i'll be bawling like a baby. i love you so much sweet girl. i pray every night that you continue spreading joy wherever you go, all the days of your life. my sunshine girl, my lemon, my little bit.

5 months of my sunshine girl.

lucy, today you are 5 months old.

i don't know how i allowed another child to grow this fast on me...

you are my little bundle of sunshine. always happy, always smiling, always shouting from the rooftops, "life is fun!"... especially at 7 in the morning. i can tell that you have a big personality + i love it already. i love YOU. last night you mastered sitting up all by yourself + we are fairly certain that you'll be graduating from a gummer grin to a couple little teeth in the coming weeks. your cheeks? i told your brother + i'll say it again... butter + syrup worthy, and your thighs? two little hammies, also squishy enough for snacking. you are the sweetest little thing, darling as pie i tell you! i always tell you that when i grow up i want to look like you :) but maybe you'll grow up to look like me, and i guess that isn't so bad either. whatever the case, i hope that you always love yourself + see yourself + your heart the way i see you + the way God does. you're a light, a true beauty, + the world sometimes likes to convince women that they aren't. i pray for you my dear, that you won't buy into it. if you get my booty, own it, if you get dad's eyebrows... well haven't you heard that "power brows" are in? you're on track for both & i have to tell you that they are two of my favorite features! i mean, the way your dark, heavy brows frame your breathtakingly blue eyes? melt me. and no one works a polka dot swimmie as cute as you do sister. it's my job to mold + shape you, and teach you what's truly beautiful in God's eyes, and i am committed 10,000 percent to doing just that. thank you for being a sweet angel baby, for being the easiest sleeper, for loving your post on my hip the way you do, and for making me a mama a second time, and to a daughter. i dreamt of you, and you are all that and so much more. 5 months! hip hooray, i'm so proud of you :)

love, mama

a morning scene + little love letters

dear commercial radio,
do you play ANYTHING classy anymore?

dear friends + family,
stamp and send those christmas cards please, i'm tired of junk mail :)

dear littles,
i love you. more + more everyday. i love how you already love each other because you are innocent and it's the only thing you know. i love how you love me + daddy. you are just sunshine in my soul.

dear husband,
i l o v e y o u .

dear december,
i'm so happy you're here! now bring on the snow already...

dear person reading this,
i sure hope you are having a lovely day filled with joy, chocolate, hugs + laughter.

dear christmas,
thank you thank you for showing up every year around this time + bringing both the holly and the jolly with you. you're the best + i love you forever.

dear anthropologie,
you're so kind to my eyes + so mean to my bank account... i love you + i don't, all in the same breath.

dear hawaii,
i am SO excited to meet you, like SO excited! counting the days until i see my toddler in the sand, my littlest chunk in her polka dot-kini + sipping cold bevs with my dreamy husband on the beach.

dear chatbooks,
seriously? $6 a book? FREE shipping? all my dreams come true! thank you for beautiful products that make it easy to get my favorite moments off of my devices + into my hands! use code: HYV7R29P & get your first book FREE

3 months of sweet lucy

lucy, 

where to begin?

let's just start with i love you precious girl, and follow it up with a couple billion things i adore about you.

the way you talk yourself to sleep.

how you wake up so happy + your face just beams the minute it meets mine (or whoever wakes you, you definitely love your mama, but you're not biased)

how you smell + feel in my arms.

the love between you + abel... are you guys serious? you smile at him like you know what you're doing, he loves you like you're his + it really does feel sometimes like you guys already know who you are to each other + have a special connection... call me crazy, but maybe it's because you're both so new + fresh from heaven? maybe your souls knew each other before we did.

you have a sparkle in your eye like none that i've ever seen before + i swear sometimes when you sparkle i feel your papaw (my daddy's) presence out of no where... could be that heaven thing again. 

everything about you is darling as pie, from your chocolate brown hair to your chunk a dunk thigh rolls that are so squishy + soft... i mean seriously, why wouldn't that look as cute on me?!

you're such a light to the world + bring joy wherever you go, thank you for being mine. for making me a mama a second time + to a daughter! i'll love you forever, i can't believe you are 3 months old already. stop it. 

love, mama

...and now a handful of little facts about you at 3 months so i never forget.

you are about to roll girlfriend, back to front. i can't leave you anywhere off of the ground, in fear you'll pull out that party trick the minute i look away. so hooray for you! you work so hard + i can feel it coming any day now.

you weighed 12lbs at your last appt, get it

you've found your thumb + it's true love so far.

you're getting scootchy. you are never where i laid you last on your play mat.

you're a fantastic sleeper. thank you.

you love the bath, always have.

you are a chaaaatttyyy girl, got that from your handsome daddy :)

you love dance parties with abel + this week we heard our first laugh from you. the fact that it was for him made it even sweeter.

a love letter to my sweet abel.

abel...

you are 21 months old, and let me just say, I seriously laugh when counting in months at this point. when people tell me their baby is 23 months, I'm like... so he's almost two? I get it, I get it... no one wants their tiny to grow up. it's just that, I have to go back and count through the months every single time, and I'd really rather just say, he's one and a half, or he will be two in January... two?! TWO?! and in place of all of that, you staying teeny forever would have been just as fine with me, because life with you is flying by too fast. 

you're the greatest around. sunshine on the cloudiest day. you've got a mouth full of teeth, that you'd never let us brush if it were up to you, your hair is coming in so nicely, no weird lengths or missing patches... I guess losing every last strand is paying off! you suddenly seem so tall and heavy, it makes me wonder how in the world i had been carrying all 23 pounds of you around with a big pregnant belly too. you love your sister. holding her, kissing her & snuggling next to her quickly became part of your daily routine. baby, you call her, in the sweetest, softest, high pitched coo I've heard, and it still melts me by the 56,789th time in the day. along with baby, you've over night found your voice & developed a vocabulary. this includes, baby, ball, bird, book, pumpkin, up, down, get down, hi, hat, hot, bye, bye-bye, cookie, cup, daddy, doggie, moon, passy(with out the s's) out, tent, spoon, baba(mama) and so many others that I can't remember right now. other people may not call these "words" because you mostly just say the beginning and sometimes end of them, but we as your parents, know exactly what you're telling us & know that full on convos are just around the bend. I for one, can't wait. I love the sweet sound of your voice and every thing you have to say!

shaking your head no is something you've done for a while, but now you actually mean it and I love that. you are not shy about letting us know when you don't want to do something. this week though, I taught you to nod when the answer is yes. you sort of just clunk your head down in front one strong time and that's that, okay. you're also not shy about letting us know when you're un happy... it's not your most adorable quality, but then again is anyone's upset/angry state their best self? I think not. we as adults (or at least the mature ones) do not try hitting or kicking(the latest) to let others know our unhappiness, but a couple more time outs and you just might understand that too.

we're convinced you're ready to potty train. you have been for a month or more now, but every day it's more obvious. so we will start down that road next week... or soonish... next week, no, soonish! (advice from those who've already been down this road, welcomed!)

you are officially jumping, one leg at a time of course, putting your whole body behind it and bending down low to get a real good spring behind you. it's jumping to you, to me it's plain adorable. 

you love to run, and always. even when you come to our room in the middle of the night, I hear your feet hit the floor and then one of my favorite sounds, thud thud thud, running across the hall, usually accompanied by a small fuss or cry because, how dare we leave you in there alone?!

adventurous and daring as you may be, you still love to snuggle and you still love your mama like no other. I'm so thankful for you. you're sweet & gentle, your quiet and noisy, you give hugs and kisses on demand, and are sensitive to others feelings and your environment. you can sense when things are weird in a room and you yell out if it makes you feel uneasy. when dad hugs me, sometimes it worries you that he's harming me and you point to us and yell, so we explain to you that we are each other's, that it's okay for us to hug and then invite you in for a family hug and you love that. grammy taught you to flirt with your eyes, batting your looooong thick lashes and looking up, MELT. you also have the cutest sweet, shy smile when you're in front of a crowd. your whole face smiles but you don't show your teeth.. cutie. the thrill of almost being pummeled by a dog running high speed is right up your alley, I can't count the number of videos I have of you, neck veins bulging, belly laughing as harvey or lucy the dog run RIGHT by you after a ball. this, along with countless other somewhat dangerous/thrilling things are so much fun to you & you laugh and laugh. your laugh could be my life's soundtrack on repeat!

I love you abel. so much it physically aches in my heart how much! I could squeeze you too tightly on any given day, and break out in song... but I won't, especially not with a group. singing in unison might be your very least favorite thing in the world (second to bedtime) and is a sure way to make you cry hard, real tears with a long recovery time afterwards. (note to all when his second birthday does arrive)

thanks for being you. for running to get me anytime the heat kicks on, so we can stand on the heater vent together, for loving pumpkins more than anyone i know, for showing me the world through new eyes, daily. being a mother, your mother, is where I found myself. where I no longer looked for outside praise or attention. it's my sweet spot, my calling. and YOU are the reason. I love you!

a couple reasons why my husband is the best.

he cooks. like reeeeally cooks. & enjoys it too. i'm more of a baker & only make a handful of meals around here (really, a handful: tacos, eggplant parmesan, pasta fagioli, most of our breakfasts, & if i'm really feeling crazy- something off of pinterest) ...so him cooking is something that i appreciate extra. my dad was an amazing cook & food was an area that he and chris could really relate on, so it's still so special to me whenever chris is making a meal or uses my dads cooking phrases like, "dinner is swerved." it keeps a little piece of my dad in our kitchen & also food in our bellies with actual nutrition.

he looks like that. 

he gave me abel. period. & i'm sure when our miss gets here, that quality is only going to explode my heart even more.

he's adventurous and gets us out and about on the weekends, but also knows how to balance fun & work & rest, and keeps our life full of the best.

he makes me laugh daily. 

he's hard working & he's enthusiastic about ideas & goals & food, three areas where i believe enthusiasm is 100% necessary. 

he treats our marriage like a true partnership. shares responsibilities, makes decisions together, respects my wants & needs, takes care of me & allows me to take care of him where needed.

he treats me like the apple of his eye. he loves the mother i am to abel & appreciates me & all that i do.

he loves abel in a way i can't even explain. it's the sweetest to see them together. playing, hugging, laughing. whatever it is, you can bet your booty my heart is somewhere on the floor melting, having leapt from my chest due to the overflowing love i have for those two.

he smells good & kisses me every morning before he leaves for work and every night before he falls asleep.

his heart is made up of pure gold, and again… he looks like that ;)

a note to my belly

…and a view from above.

i love you. i am amazed at how you are able to grow and stretch the way you have, twice now. it truly blows my mind. i mostly love what is inside of you, my sweet baby girl & i'm thankful for your protection and ability to carry her before my arms can. 

since about week 35, you've been getting a little bit of a bad rap over here because honestly, you are sort of in the way of a few things… like bending at the waist, fitting through spaces that should be plenty big enough, restricting normal human mobility, therefore making me mostly an observer when it comes to running & chasing & things like that. clothes, what clothes? if i'm 100% honest with the world, i'd tell them that i feel ready to say goodbye to you until next time & hello to a baby…

regardless, i wanted to stop in and let you know, that in all of this, i still love you a whole lot & am so grateful for your presence and purpose. it won't be long before i can't even remember the size or feel of you and i'll miss you a little. thank you for hanging around & continuously reminding me what's to come! for housing our little lady & all of her sweet kicks & rolls. you're the best pregnant belly i could ask for & without you, i wouldn't be gearing up to become a mama again! here's to a couple more weeks together :)

a year & a half...

hey there mister, 

remember when you were born & made me the happiest on earth?

& then out of no where you were one week old?

and then a whole month?

then we got to half a year and were like, what?! so we had a party to celebrate it.

life only got better & better with you since the day you came into the world & when we found ourselves at a whole year, i couldn't believe how quickly the time had passed & how much i wanted to freeze every second with you & store it away on a shelf somewhere so that i could never forget a moment, a smile, a milestone, your smell or the way you felt in my arms…

well guess what peanut…

nothing has changed.

you are still the best part of every day & i'm so thankful for the past year & a half of life with you. thanks for being the best kid around & for making me feel like a million bucks all the time. 

i love you tiny guy…

love, mommy

a letter to my sweet girl.

i love you. i haven't even met you yet, and i already love you, which only tells me that my breath will be taken away & i will be enamored with you and your sweet baby perfection, just like i was with your brother when he was born (& still am today). i know you are so beautiful in there and i am SO curious if you have hair... not that we'd love you any less if you didn't, we just only have experience producing little bald babies so far & so we are excited to see what you present us with! hairless or not, you'll be perfect in every way. i can't wait to smell your sweet skin & kiss you a billion times. i can't wait to watch abel hold you & see your dad melt like he never has before over 'his girl'... that has been my title for the past decade but i will happily share it with you beauty. i know that your papaw in heaven helped God pick you for us & i know that becoming your mama is an honor & a privilege & that each breath you take will be just as important to me as the last.

i hope that you have your daddy's adventurous heart & aren't afraid of anything. i hope that you are brave & free & get into lots of fun trouble with your brother. i hope you also have a sweet and gentle spirit like mine & that when you are 26 you still feel 5 years old in your heart. i hope you always see yourself the way that i see you & the way God sees you, and if ever you don't, i hope you come to me so that i can remind you of your beauty inside & out. i can't wait to meet you. i know that you are a perfect fit for our family & that the love in our hearts will only grow to make you feel like you are special & loved & wanted always. for now, stay cozy in my belly... i'll keep sending delicious foods your way, and you keep sending little love bumps mine. i love you sweet girl.

love, mama

hey there mister, when did you become a teenager?

HOW IS THIS MY CHILD?!

i am the mother of a one year old??!

he is getting so big, but is still so little at the same time.

at 13.5 months he is basically running, and everywhere... that cute little run is accompanied by an even more adorable one arm swingin' by his side (melt me). he loves to sweep, play with anything slightly resembling a ball (this includes cuties + apples), play hide + seek/chase, be outside, watch bubble guppies, snuggle + eat everything in sight... or at least give it a try. he is SO sweet + i'm still caught off guard by the amount of love i have for him + how it just continues to grow. 

this particular posture fast forwards me 15 years when he's tired from a day at school + whatever activity he's involved in + i come home to him passed out on the couch, tv still on, snacks on the coffee table... 

i don't' know, something like that.

it definitely looks a lot like the boy i dated around that age ;)

we are so lucky. we have a son + that is such a huge responsibility + privilege.

abel, i love you forever + a million years more. i hope you always have the sweet + curious nature you have today. i hope you always smile at people when you walk by, just like you do now. i hope you always give me hugs + kisses, even when you're grown + i especially hope that you always remember that your family is a good home base + we will be here for you in every way, every day of your life even when you have a family of your own. you are the bright spot in each day. i love you, mama

a b e l

this week i am super nostalgic + overly emotional because on Saturday, our sweet Abel turns ONE... are you kidding me? it's been a whole year? there's just no way.

it's the craziest thing how i remember it like it was yesterday, but it also seems so far away because i don't even remember life before him. so i'm all reminiscent over here + looking back at how the year with him played out + LOVING it. he's such a sweet soul, such a giver. still so quiet + smiley, still fuzzy haired like the first day we met him (maybe by 2 buddy). i just can't get over it. 

on top of all the emotions, i am giving chris and i a big fat pat on the back, because we did it! i wouldn't say i ever had doubts that we wouldn't, but i mean... honestly, i don't care how many books you've read, or kids you've baby sat... when you have a baby, especially your first, you really have no idea what it will be like + it's sort of an all in kinda thing. so hooray for us! we kept our tiny human alive + well. he's fed + rested. + on most days bathed ;) he is for the most part incredibly well behaved + all around a little piece of heaven. most importantly though, he is loved... + loved + loved... + loved well. 

i have learned so much about love this year. a new kind of love that i had never experienced before. being a parent is the most wonderful privilege + i am so thankful thankful thankful for the opportunity.

abel, my love for you is more than you'll ever know. maybe you'll understand it better when you have kids one day, but even then i don't know, because mamas + daddys have different experiences! you are the very best thing we have ever done in this life + i hope that you grow up into the most amazing man one day, all the while knowing how loved + appreciated you are. thank you for being the smile in our every day + teaching us a new kind of love, the best kind of love! i can't wait to celebrate you this weekend + watch you cake your face like never before... you're going to love it! 

a million kisses, your mama 

(top photo from the morning after he was born, bottom photo from yesterdays nap)

little love letters.

dear fall, 

please get here soon. it's been raining all week & i'm hoping with my whole heart that you're not teasing us and really ARE right around the corner.

dear abel, 

the cuteness... really?

dear breakfast, 

you truly are my favorite meal of every day. there will never be a day that i won't want you, and if for some reason i am not able to enjoy you in the morning, i will have breakfast for dinner.

dear two of my favorite blondes (brianna & abby), 
i. can. not. stinkin. wait. for you to both visit! obviously, you are coming separately (although, what a blast it would be if you came at the same time)... & i am so thrilled to get a happy little visit both this month & next!

dear starbucks-iced vanilla chai,
you are so dang good. it's been all cozy out & it feels like i should be having a warm drink, but you're just too good... you have my heart. love you... mean it.

dear person reading this, 
i hope you are having a truly wonderful day. if it's raining where you are, i hope you've got something cozy in your presence... if it's sunshiney, i hope you're soaking it in! you're doing great today, whatever it is that you are doing! thank you for reading & loving on our family.

dear stripes,
i adore you, all day-every day.

dear husband,
you're adorable & so much cooler than me. i'm so happy that i get to do life with you & i'm so proud of all that you've accomplished this year! cheers all around (insert clapping hands emoji here).

dear abel, 
the cuteness... really?
(nope this isn't an accidental repeat... i mean, come on!)

dear sisters,
how did i get so (this is the 4th place i've wanted to use the phrase 'so stinkin' & had to choose another one because i already used it...) LUCKY!? two of the very best friends in the world right here in my own family. privileged.

happy friday + happy gramday!

milestones.

Sweet Abel... how is it that in the same week, you've started pulling up on things, crawling (even if it's a hand-hand-lift one knee through, adorably gimpy one), & your top teeth are just barely through? three major events in the SAME WEEK?! give a mom a chance! you're growing oh so fast my little man. You are too stinkin' cute & i think at this point you know it... You are NOT into the solids, although i still try every day. spaghetti squash seems to be the one & only thing you don't purse your lips at... so spaghetti squash for days i say. You're officially huge, okay not really, but you are getting so much bigger every day it feels like. the way you sleep is insanely cute, i can't stand it. you roll all around like a rollie-pollie & often times end up on your belly, rumpus high in the air... MELT MY HEART. you're babbling non stop & da da da da da is one of your favorites... you haven't shortened it to just two yet, so i'm not claiming it as a first word or anything (although your dad might like to think otherwise ;)). you do NOT love when something is taken away from you... meltdown central, & when people cheer too loud for you it scares you & you bury your head in my chest (so sad & also 100% adorable). you do however love the 'abel is the best' song... or any song/music for that matter. we have now transitioned into the, 'i only want my mommy' phase, it is the sweetest thing in the world & isn't hurting my ego at all to be your everything for right now... but we are still socializing as usual & as long as i'm in viewing distance you aren't totally opposed to another set of arms. 

you're the best abel. you really are. you make me want to be a better person all around. a better mama, a better wife, daughter, sister. i want to be better so that i can show you & teach YOU how to be. it can be pretty scary raising a human being (completely and totally awesome too)... it's our job to lead you in the right direction, to teach you to love Jesus, to advocate for you, love you, mold you. i believe we are off to a good start, but from the 25 years of life experience that i do have, i think this age might be the easy part. i'm ready though bud... you & i? we're a great team, and your dad and me?? unstoppable. we as a family will grow & change together, for the better. i love you so much my sweet abel. 7 months & counting... they are probably the favorite months of my life so far. love, your mama

happy 5 months abel maddox!

5 months?!

can you just stay in this stage forever? you currently...

+are so cute that i can't stand it

+have two tiny teeth that have just broken through the surface.. OMG

+smile & laugh 98%  of the time... don't worry, the other 2% is made up of sleep ;)

(yes that's right, 2%... you're not keen on naps)
+think it's super funny when i drink water
+are learning to sit up! & you're almost sitting on your own!
+have the fuzziest little head. wouldn't quite consider it hair yet... but we're getting there, & fuzz is in these days anyhow...
+love to bounce
+grab any & everything you can... very handsy i tell ya. everything that you grab then goes straight to your perfect little mouth (one of my few contributions to your appearance, & i am OWNING it)
+love being outside
+looooove strawberries & they definitely love you back
+are still the joy in my days & warmth in my heart

i love you my little baby. thanks for the best 5 months in this wonderful life so far.

i'll love you forever, i'll like you for always, as long as I'm living my baby you'll be...

how are you 4 months old abel?!

i'm really trying hard to just enjoy every bit of your life (this isn't hard to do, because you're great) but at the exact same time, it all just makes me want to cry my eyes out because you are growing up too fast!!

your coos, & screams, & the new little giggle we are starting to see more of... the bubbles you blow & the constant drool. you're my pie guy. cutie, chunker, stinker... you name it, you specialize in it. i love all of the cute things you do. discovering life & working though the limitations of your 4 month old body not keeping up with your seemingly more advanced brain... boy am i in for it when you do figure out how to get on the move! for now we'll just stick with the rolling & scootching around, and the occasional turtle spins. i'm so happy that the weather is getting hotter & you are gracing us with more of your chunky & naker little bod. LOVE. you love to be outside. you love to be held. you love love music & bright colors. you are the best. i couldn't have imagined a baby better than you. i'm curious how your future siblings will fair, because i don't think it gets cuter than you either... we'll cross our fingers for them ;) anyhow, sloooooowwwww dowwwwwwn okay? you've mastered rolling over both ways, you're way too close to sitting, and your legs are strong enough to make me think you are probably going to walk or stand earlier than most babes... you are so smart, & i love it... just not ready for you to get all big yet. i hope you are loving life with me & daddy as much as we are loving it with you! and in case you don't remember being 4 months old (like most of us do... :)) that's why i'm writing you these love letters. 

i'll love you forever, i'll like your for always, as long as i'm living my baby you'll be...

love, mama

**we made this video on the Vine App! Come & join us! Hillary Salvaggione & Mr. Salvaggione has one too! // Chris Salvaggione **

it was YOU in there…

 i loved you from the day i first imagined you...
& then more when i found out you had actually taken up a home in my tummy.
each day you grew bigger & then you made your presence known & started giving me love bumps throughout the days & i loved that... & you even more.
you were so strong through everything that came our way in december... your little heart never missed a beat. you were perfect to me in every way.
you got the hiccups & favored the right side of your home.
i never felt alone because you were always in there to keep me company.
i dreamt of your face & all of your precious little baby parts. i imagined how sweet the little feet kicking me would be. i loved you.
so much sweet Abel.
...but as much as i loved you then, it can't even compare to the love i have for you now.
i didn't know that it was YOU in there.
the YOU that loves to listen to music & stare up at the fan spinning.
the YOU that always (& still) gets the hiccups.
the YOU that loves to kick his legs & wiggle all around on the changing table.
the YOU that has the softest & fuzziest little head.
the YOU that smells like pure heaven, has the sweetest baby coos, & is growing too fast for my mama heart.
the YOU that takes stretching out verrrry seriously & treats each one like it's the first & the last.
the YOU that always wants to be held & snuggled.
the YOU with the chins (plural), sweet tummy, & skin so soft i wish it was my own.
the YOU that for the first time the other day smiled AT me. i stood above you & you gazed up at me with those deep blue eyes & smiled... AT me, into my soul. those ten seconds are my new favorite ten seconds of this life. i never want to forget that moment & the way it felt, the way i felt.
every breath you breathe is a blessing to me & i am so happy that i know YOU & have YOU to love everyday. i couldn't thank God enough for you.
i love you Abel.
i'm so glad it was YOU in there...
love, mommy